Humans are Weird – Diminishing Returns
“Come now Human Friend Kia!” Writhesoften called out as she threw herself into the next body of water.
The sullen mutter the massive mammal gave in response didn’t quite translate from the air to the water. Writhesoften pulsed out a good swimming pace and thrust several appendages above the surface even as her down thrusting appendages brushed the algae like plants that grew from the bottom of the marsh. Her vision of the human clarified and she watched in bemusement as Human Friend Kia lowered one of her massive appendages into the biota rich water of the marsh.
Human Friend Kia had absolutely insisted that she wasn’t afraid of the alien life that the marshes teamed with.
“I grew up back in the bayou,” she had insisted, angling her head in a human expression of defiance. “Not one of those artificially restored bayous either! Mamma’s people had a shack back in there since before we was keeping records! I ain’t feard of no murk!”
The human had then suddenly startled and then rapidly sent gurgling noises through the mystery system of tubes that took up a large portion of her bio mass. This seemed to compose her body language and she sat is a far calmer and more formal position.
“I have no concern over the local biota load,” Human Friend Kia had assured her. “I am simply used to a less extreme temperature gradient. I will adjust with time, I simply want to put of getting completely soaked as long as possible.”
The human certainly had, Writhesoften mused as she watched Human Friend Kia finally ease one leg and then the other down into the marsh. Human Friend Kia’s whole body shuddered as the water sloshed over the protective lip of her boot protection and, presumably began soaking her outer membrane. Writhesoften calculated the amount of time it was going to cost them for Human Friend Kia to cross each marsh at the ginger pace she was showing and tried to dismiss the feeling of annoyance her calculations generated. Human Friend Kia was more than valuable enough to make up for any inadequacy in marsh hopping.
“Come on now!” Writhesoften called out cheerfully. “We are almost to the next collection point!”
Writhesoften let herself dip below the surface and struck out for the best depth for optimum speed. They reached the next mound, a truly impressive spire that reached up out of the water to tower even over the human, well behind her initial projections and Writhesoften had to fight bag the urge to groan as she noted the time. However Human Friend Kia scooped her up and held her to the observation platform (that would be almost submerged at high water) and Writhesoften again balanced her usefulness against the lost speed. Not to mention her primary function of fending off the largest of the reptilian predators. Baby-gators, Human Friend Kia called them. It had taken some convincing to get her to postpone domestication attempts on the dangerous species.
Writhesoften noted the signs of decreased activity of the spire’s inhabitants and creators alike and then tapped Human Friend Kia to be let down. They set out across the remainder of the marsh surrounding the spire. On the other side there was something of a ledge to get over to get out of the marsh and Writhesoften found it somewhat tricky to climb out. She even had to provide Human Friend Kia leverage to get over the slippery bank. Human Friend Kia reciprocate by carrying her across the grassy overland. To Writhesoften’s surprise, instead of pausing at the edge and easing in one leg at a time as she had done before (it had been Writhesoften’s plan to dismount during this pause) Human Friend Kia stepped into the water without breaking her original stride until the greater viscosity of the water and grasses forcible slowed her.
“Pardon me Human Friend Kia,” Writhesoften called out, prodding her to get her attention. “Isn’t this marsh the same temperature as the last?”
Human Friend Kia glanced down at her with a rueful twist to her face.
“Told’ja,” she said falling back into what Writhesoften presumed was her mother accent, “I ain’t feard of no swamp juice. It was just a little chilly.”
“But this is the same temperature!” Writhesoften insisted, fighting the feeling that they were having two different conversations.
“Yeah,” the human admitted, bobbing her head up and down in time to her steps, “but I’m all soaked already now. Doesn’t matter.”
Writhesoften tried to parse that, and then gave up as they approached the next spire. She would take her invertebrate observations now, and offer these human observations to the physio-psychologist back at base. There was no way she was understanding why a human grew less reluctant to get in water the wetter they already were.
Please go and leave a new rating and review on my 3rd book!
Amazon!
Barnes & Noble
Powell's Books
Google Play Books
Kobo By Rakuten
What does it mean when your human friend says “Watch This?”? Why does this simple phrase seem to terrify any alien that has first appendage experience with humans? #HFY #HumansAreWeird #HumansAreSpaceOrcs #EarthIsADeathWorld #EarthIsSpaceAustralia
Hey! The books are moving well on Amazon and now have 300 reviews and ratings! If you bought the book and enjoyed it, it would really help me out if you leave a quick star rating on Amazon. A review would be great but just stars would be a huge boost *****!
QUICK NOTE: RE: everyone who asked. The book is avaliable in Amazon regions US-UK-DE-FR-ES-IT-NL-JP-BR-CA-MX-AU-IN. HOWEVER The above link only takes you to the US Amazon site. The one indicated by the .com ending. If it says "not avaliable in your country" that just means that you need to click over to your Amazon region.
Of course if you want a signed first edition you can email me at the email on my website and I can ship you a signed Author copy of the first edition until I run out of first run books.
AMAZON
“Come now Human Friend Kia!” Writhesoften called out as she threw herself into the next body of water.
The sullen mutter the massive mammal gave in response didn’t quite translate from the air to the water. Writhesoften pulsed out a good swimming pace and thrust several appendages above the surface even as her down thrusting appendages brushed the algae like plants that grew from the bottom of the marsh. Her vision of the human clarified and she watched in bemusement as Human Friend Kia lowered one of her massive appendages into the biota rich water of the marsh.
Human Friend Kia had absolutely insisted that she wasn’t afraid of the alien life that the marshes teamed with.
“I grew up back in the bayou,” she had insisted, angling her head in a human expression of defiance. “Not one of those artificially restored bayous either! Mamma’s people had a shack back in there since before we was keeping records! I ain’t feard of no murk!”
The human had then suddenly startled and then rapidly sent gurgling noises through the mystery system of tubes that took up a large portion of her bio mass. This seemed to compose her body language and she sat is a far calmer and more formal position.
“I have no concern over the local biota load,” Human Friend Kia had assured her. “I am simply used to a less extreme temperature gradient. I will adjust with time, I simply want to put of getting completely soaked as long as possible.”
The human certainly had, Writhesoften mused as she watched Human Friend Kia finally ease one leg and then the other down into the marsh. Human Friend Kia’s whole body shuddered as the water sloshed over the protective lip of her boot protection and, presumably began soaking her outer membrane. Writhesoften calculated the amount of time it was going to cost them for Human Friend Kia to cross each marsh at the ginger pace she was showing and tried to dismiss the feeling of annoyance her calculations generated. Human Friend Kia was more than valuable enough to make up for any inadequacy in marsh hopping.
“Come on now!” Writhesoften called out cheerfully. “We are almost to the next collection point!”
Writhesoften let herself dip below the surface and struck out for the best depth for optimum speed. They reached the next mound, a truly impressive spire that reached up out of the water to tower even over the human, well behind her initial projections and Writhesoften had to fight bag the urge to groan as she noted the time. However Human Friend Kia scooped her up and held her to the observation platform (that would be almost submerged at high water) and Writhesoften again balanced her usefulness against the lost speed. Not to mention her primary function of fending off the largest of the reptilian predators. Baby-gators, Human Friend Kia called them. It had taken some convincing to get her to postpone domestication attempts on the dangerous species.
Writhesoften noted the signs of decreased activity of the spire’s inhabitants and creators alike and then tapped Human Friend Kia to be let down. They set out across the remainder of the marsh surrounding the spire. On the other side there was something of a ledge to get over to get out of the marsh and Writhesoften found it somewhat tricky to climb out. She even had to provide Human Friend Kia leverage to get over the slippery bank. Human Friend Kia reciprocate by carrying her across the grassy overland. To Writhesoften’s surprise, instead of pausing at the edge and easing in one leg at a time as she had done before (it had been Writhesoften’s plan to dismount during this pause) Human Friend Kia stepped into the water without breaking her original stride until the greater viscosity of the water and grasses forcible slowed her.
“Pardon me Human Friend Kia,” Writhesoften called out, prodding her to get her attention. “Isn’t this marsh the same temperature as the last?”
Human Friend Kia glanced down at her with a rueful twist to her face.
“Told’ja,” she said falling back into what Writhesoften presumed was her mother accent, “I ain’t feard of no swamp juice. It was just a little chilly.”
“But this is the same temperature!” Writhesoften insisted, fighting the feeling that they were having two different conversations.
“Yeah,” the human admitted, bobbing her head up and down in time to her steps, “but I’m all soaked already now. Doesn’t matter.”
Writhesoften tried to parse that, and then gave up as they approached the next spire. She would take her invertebrate observations now, and offer these human observations to the physio-psychologist back at base. There was no way she was understanding why a human grew less reluctant to get in water the wetter they already were.
Please go and leave a new rating and review on my 3rd book!
Amazon!
Barnes & Noble
Powell's Books
Google Play Books
Kobo By Rakuten
What does it mean when your human friend says “Watch This?”? Why does this simple phrase seem to terrify any alien that has first appendage experience with humans? #HFY #HumansAreWeird #HumansAreSpaceOrcs #EarthIsADeathWorld #EarthIsSpaceAustralia
Hey! The books are moving well on Amazon and now have 300 reviews and ratings! If you bought the book and enjoyed it, it would really help me out if you leave a quick star rating on Amazon. A review would be great but just stars would be a huge boost *****!
QUICK NOTE: RE: everyone who asked. The book is avaliable in Amazon regions US-UK-DE-FR-ES-IT-NL-JP-BR-CA-MX-AU-IN. HOWEVER The above link only takes you to the US Amazon site. The one indicated by the .com ending. If it says "not avaliable in your country" that just means that you need to click over to your Amazon region.
Of course if you want a signed first edition you can email me at the email on my website and I can ship you a signed Author copy of the first edition until I run out of first run books.
AMAZON
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