Betty Adams Tall Tales
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    • Book 1 "Humans are Weird: I Have the Data"
    • Book 2 "Humans are Weird: We Took a Vote"
    • Book 3 "Humans are Weird: Let's Work It Out"
    • "Flying Sparks"
    • "Dying Embers"
    • "Hidden Fires"
    • Testimonials
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The Bat Party Continues

8/29/2018

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There are basically four ways to know an animal was in a place scientifically. 
1) Sighting. You actually saw the animal. Either with your own eyes or on a wildlife camera. 
2)Sound. You heard the raptors scree or the coyotes night song. 
3)Sign. The bear stripped the bark off the tree from twelve feet up to the ground. The woodpecker left a thousand holes in that tree. 

And of course one of the most useful ones.

4)Scat. The animal pooped there. 

Well according to #4 the bats who I saw weeks ago and heard last week, were over every single car in the parking complex. 
There is simply bat guano everywhere. 
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Fall Times

8/28/2018

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As falls comes on I keep finding the shed exoskeletons of various insects around the forest.
This is much less disturbing than one might think. 
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Humans are Weird - Storms A'Comming

8/27/2018

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Humans are Weird – Storms A’Commin

                “And was there any sign that these atmospheric disturbances before the mainframe crashed?” Twistunder asked.
“Nope.” The human replied.
At least that was what Twistunder thought the human had said. The massive alien was curled over the side of one of the plasticized containers that housed the research base’s computing nodes. Twistunder spread out his appendages and let the ambient atmospheric conditions fill his awareness. The moisture in the air was stable so far as he could tell. He would not need to moisturize for hours. The atmospheric currents were smooth and regular. He knew that his species really wasn’t skilled in measuring such things but he had learned a few tricks from the Trisk who he had served with. All in all there was no indication that anything was wrong.
“Why are you so concerned about the functionality of the sensor array then?” Twistunder asked.
“Those storms come up fast,” the human replied. “We don’t want to get caught out.”
“Indeed,” Twistunder muttered as he observed the human wrench out the damaged component with what looked like far more than necessary force.
The human focused his binocular vision on the component and his face twisted into an expression of displeasure. Twistunder thought it had been damaged by electrical discharge but that made no sense and he was no engineer. The human was about to replace the component when he suddenly snarled and dropped the item and gripped one hand in the other. Twistunder felt a wave of pain pheromones wash over him and the fact that he could sense it at all in the thin atmosphere told him how extreme the human’s pain must be.
Twistunder contemplated offering assistance but the human suddenly straightened and slammed the top of the container shut.
“We’re leaving.” The human said curtly.
“Of course,” Twistunder said. “I will drive and we will get back to the base to tend to your injury.”
“What injury?” The human asked even as he proceeded to lock down the container.
“The one that caused you such pain just now,” Twistunder replied.
The human chuckled and glanced over at Twistunder as he gathered up his tools.
“I’m not injured,” he said.
But at that same moment he grunted in pain and flexed his hand.
“I believe I have localized your injury,” Twistunder said, reaching up for the jointed appendage.
The human snatched away his hand.
“I am not injured!” he snapped. The human took a deep breath and tossed his tools back into the transport. “Seriously, little man. I am not injured. I’ll explain on the way back to the base but we need to leave now.”
“Very well,” Twistunder began.
The human bent down and scooped him up before tossing him into the travel couch and leaping into the control couch. Twistunder took a moment to secure his safety restraints as the human initiated the engines and headed towards the base at maximum acceleration.
“Why are we returning to base at an unsafe velocity?” Twistunder demanded.
“There’s a storm coming,” the human said in a low tone, flexing his hand.
Twistunder pondered this for a moment.
“Pardon me,” he said, “but I believe the reason that we came out here was because the predictive system for storms was nonfunctional.”
“I don’t need that fancy computer to tell me a storm’s coming when it’s this close,” the human said. “My hand starts acting up. That was that pain you noticed.”
“You hand experiences pain when a storm happens?” Twistunder asked in confusion.
“Hurts like mad for a bit,” the human said. “But it passes.”
Twistunder couldn’t think of a response and after a moment the human grinned at him.
“It’s a cartilage and bone thing.” The human said. “And here it comes.”
Twistunder was vaguely aware that the human had just accelerated the transport past the suggested limits but he was focused on the western sky were the light of the sun was being blotted out by a sparking mass of chaos.
“Storm’s a’ coming.” The human commented grimly. 
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Weekend Schedules

8/26/2018

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1) you have too much to do today
2) do it anyway
3) what you don't do will be looking over your shoulder tomorrow in judgment
​4) ignore it till then 
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Sunsets

8/24/2018

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Sunset is coming earlier every night. As I walked home tonight the sun was gently nestling down into the shoulders of the cliff  behind my house. As I glanced at the rays that sifted through the trees winter gently reached out and massaged my neck.  
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Bugs Aren't Bugging Me

8/23/2018

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Not that I am complaining mind, but I just ran a third of  a mile with my legs and arms fully exposed and not one mosquito took the bait. I suspect that the bats are now offering me bodyguard duties in exchange for all of the bugs I attract. 
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Batty Facts

8/22/2018

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The bats have started talking to me when I run around in the dark at night.
Well it is one bat, and my friendly neighborhood Batwoman says it was just curious about me but still.
Hawaii is full of MEGAbats. Seriously. Apparently the North American continent is full of microbats. Very small cute microbats. Hawaii is full of caves of MEGAbats. They eat fruit and the bugs that bite humans. 

Sooooo, MEGAbat vs Annoying Mosquito? 

Don't pet the micorbats. 
Or the MEGAbats. 
They are wild and free. 


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The Woods Are Alive With Teenage Animals

8/21/2018

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Just what the title says. The woods are alive with teenage animals as summer turns to fall. It is awkward and adorable. 
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Humans are Weird - Filter Failure

8/20/2018

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Humans are Weird – Filter Failure

“And yes,” Human Sally said with a gusty mammalian sigh, “I am aware of how bad that sounded.”
Twistunder lifted his main gripping appendages in what he had learned humans took to be an interrogative posture.
“Then why did you ask the question?” he asked.
“Because I didn’t figure out how bad it sounded till after I asked it.” Human Sally replied. “I mean in the context it wasn’t so terrible.”
“But you did have the context that your coworkers would take it in,” Twistunder said, carefully parsing the complex human auditory language. “Are you saying that you were deliberately ignoring data you had access to?”
Human Sally groaned and rolled her eyes. It meant something but Twistunder was a touch unsure what exactly.
“Look Twistunder,” she said. “Sometimes the filter just fails.”
“What filter?” Twistunder asked.
“The one between a human’s thoughts and her mouth,” she explained. “That two decades of learned behavior that we are supposed to have by the time we are legally considered adults.”
Twistunder pondered this. Perhaps it was simply one of those mysteries that they would have to accept about their new allies. But still…
“And you truly expressed that you found it odd that people…” Twistunder paused as he worked to repeat the near gibberish phrase the human had used.
“Look,” Human Sally interrupted him, “I know how to make stuff work how it really isn’t supposed to right? Jury-rigging we call it.”
“One of humanities most useful skill sets,” Twistunder replied. And its most terrifying. He thought privately. Though the thought that a fully adult, non-neuro compromised human couldn’t control what they said was perhaps a close second.
“So in that context my statement made sense,” Human Sally said nodding her head. “If I know a different way to do something with the tools at hand I don’t see why it would disturb someone I am benefiting by doing that.”
“Perhaps you should state that way in the future,” Twistunder suggested.
“I suppose you’re right,” Human Sally replied.
“For the record please state the phrase you used earlier,” Twistunder requested.
“I just don’t understand why folks get so uncomfortable when I offer to misuse knives.” 
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How Big is a Nope?

8/19/2018

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“Introducing the Cecropia silkmoth, North America’s largest native moth, with a female wingspan reaching six inches. These striking moths live all across the Eastern United States and are one of over 1,860 species of Lepidoptera (Moths and Butterflies) found in the park! You can protect these beautiful insects by capturing them only in photographs. What type of Lepidoptera have you seen in the park? Photo by Jessie Snow at Sugarlands Visitor Center.”


To some even the smallest of spiders is too big. It is a many eyed nope. But general consensus is that any spider who cannot comfortably sit on a quarter is firmly in NOPE territory. Ants are less bothersome but a solid inch long carpenter ant (and anything bigger) inches into nope.
Is there a nope size for butterflies?
FYI the worlds largest known butterflies are over a foot across and samples had to be taken with a shotgun because of how high they fly. Remember that scene in the Hobbit where Bilbo climbs that tree in the dark forest to spy out the lay of the land and meets all those giant black butterflies at the top of the canopy? That’s where that came from. 
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  • Home
    • Book 1 "Humans are Weird: I Have the Data"
    • Book 2 "Humans are Weird: We Took a Vote"
    • Book 3 "Humans are Weird: Let's Work It Out"
    • "Flying Sparks"
    • "Dying Embers"
    • "Hidden Fires"
    • Testimonials
  • The Aliens
    • Dying Embers
    • Humans Are Weird
    • Miscellaneous
    • Fan Art
  • Betty's Blog
    • Humans Are Weird
  • Store: Betty's Booty
  • About & Contact
    • Bibliography
    • Links