Humans are Weird – An Appealing Revelation
First Sister Northern adjusted her sheath skirt for perhaps the twentieth time and fought to keep her frill from flushing with irritated colors. The random booming of the scatter guns did not make the situation any easier. Her outer membrane was nearly a translucent pale green and while her betrothed insisted it was the most beautiful coloration he had ever seen, it was still irritating to know your emotions were being broadcast with such clarity that even the giant, lumbering bipedal aliens knew what you are feeling.
“Can I help you with that?” Third Brother asked as he swayed up to her.
First Sister Northern wondered what he thought he could do about a sheath skirt that was just a millimeter too small thanks to her most recent molt, but realized with a flush of embarrassment that he was talking about the crate she was attempting to balance with one arm.
“Please,” she agreed with a curl of her antenna.
The human swept it up easily in one of his hands, and First Sister Northern marveled again at how the stubby human fingers managed to effect such delicate handling. He stared out in the direction she had been going and First Sister Northern trotted along by his side. It was second nature by now to reach up and apply a quick pressure to Third Brother’s elbow when he was about to either wander off the path or stumble over a rock. It seemed to be second nature to Third Brother as well as he meekly, almost automatically responded to the touches that certainly had no power to force his movements.
“Where does this need to go?” Third Brother asked.
“I was taking it to the vineyard on the south slope,” she replied, and the human grunted in acknowledgment.
There was an odd note to his voice. From her experience with humans First Sister Northern knew that it usually denoted extreme focus. As this human was notorious for the casual way he usually transported large and heavy items she doubted it was because he was focused on the task at hand. Therefore she wasn’t surprised to note that his binocular eyes were clearly not focused on anything in their immediate vicinity.
“Is there one of the flying predators over the eastern hills?” she asked.
The revelation that what the initial survey team had taken to be pollinators were actually predators with no qualms about snatching the very skeins from their gardens had been a horrific shock to the colony on this world, had nearly caused the abandonment of the world despite it’s tactical importance. While First Sister Northern’s hive had been against inviting a human colony group to solve the problem none of the hive’s mother’s now questioned it’s efficacy. A sudden boom from a nearby scattergun caused both the Shatar and the human to jump and seemed to recall the absent human to the present.
“If one of those buggers are there I can’t see it,” he stated. “Why do you ask?”
“Your eyes are clearly not focused on the ground in front of you,” First Sister Northern said, giving him another push to avoid a particularly exposed root in the path. “I had assumed something was pulling your attention away.”
The human grinned down at her and for the first time First Sister Northern felt a clear and distinct unease. She might indeed be a novice at reading the fleshy expressions of human faces. She certainly had been distracted with her plans to greet and then court the First Brother who had landed just days before this human’s family had. There was no doubt she had neglected her duties as a future matriarch, leaving the tricky business of interspecies diplomacy to the wise old frills of her Grandmothers. That was all true enough, but by her Mother’s antenna she could detect a Brother hiding something he didn’t want a First Sister to know.
“You know how absent minded I am,” Third Brother said with a grin. “Not like I have anything around here worth looking at either.”
They went on a few paces while First Sister Northern let her head tilt from side to side as she inspected the human for signs of injury. Why her mind skittered immediately to bodily harm she wasn’t quite sure, but it was the way her antenna tipped. Third Brother suddenly twitched guiltily and glanced down at her.
“Not to say you ain’t worth looking at!” He assured her, his regional accent growing thicker at his flustered emotional state. “You’re right pretty. Easy on the eyes.”
“Thank you,” she said in a deliberately calm tone as her proboscis flicked out and dabbed a bit of dust off of her eye.
Third Brother looked distinctly uneasy and turned his head away and began whistling.
The thin, plant fiber weave was clinging to the skin on his back as if it had been applied there with more than just the saline solution the humans were constantly excreting. First Sister Northern let herself fall just behind the human. She reached up and lightly lifted the cloth from the human’s back. Third Brother jolted forward and emitted a yowl of pain that caused First Sister Northern’s antenna to curl in tight, painful coils.
“And does your Mother know that you are out of your Father’s shade with what I can assume are solar radiation burns all over your back?” First Sister Northern asked as she pulled her comm device out of it’s pouch.
“Please don’t snitch!” Third Brother gasped out.
“Oh, I am very much snitching,” First Sister Northern said in a cold tone.
Third Brother gave a groan and dropped down to a sitting position. She felt a twinge of sympathy for his plight. It was maddening to be stuck in the deep shade when the hives bustled with life and merriment. Sister duties won out easily over sentiment however. She didn’t want the culmination of her courtship marred by having a human medical emergency distracting the neighbors.
We DID it!
100 Ratings on Amazon!
There will be an open to all book draw now!
1st Prize will be: ... look I was going to make a list but I am hot and tired and I thought I'd have more time to plan this out.
Like 4 physical books, 2 e-books, an audiobook, and probably some swag. I'll work out the details when the brain is braining again.
Instructions on how to enter the draw will be on a youtube video that will be up soon.
It will involve leaving a comment on a video.
More details to follow.
Humans are Weird: I Have the Data: by Betty Adams, Adelia Gibadullina, Paperback | Barnes & Noble® (barnesandnoble.com)
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Hey! The books are moving well on Amazon and now have 98 reviews and ratings! If you bought the book and enjoyed it, it would really help me out if you leave a quick star rating on Amazon. A review would be great but just stars would be a huge boost *****!
QUICK NOTE: RE: everyone who asked. The book is avaliable in Amazon regions US-UK-DE-FR-ES-IT-NL-JP-BR-CA-MX-AU-IN. HOWEVER The above link only takes you to the US Amazon site. The one indicated by the .com ending. If it says "not avaliable in your country" that just means that you need to click over to your Amazon region.
Of course if you want a signed first edition you can email me at the email on my website and I can ship you a signed Author copy of the first edition for the same price as the crowdfunding campaign $35 domestic and $50 overseas. I'll do that until I run out of extra books.
Audiobook - Author Self Narration
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