Humans are Weird – Twister
It was really too warm for any of them in the sealed cab of the transport. Touchesinturn let the majority of his mass slump against the cool surface of the window even as his lagging appendages drifted in the soothing heat of the water of his travel sack. The soothing sound of Human Friend Bobby Joe’s snoring from the front of the cab drowned out the faint whine of the gravity repulsors that really should have been sent in for maintenance several weeks ago. The taste of human sweat nearly saturated the cab. Shatar Friend Second Sister was perched in the driving couch, occasionally flicking her proboscis out to take a sip from a cold drink. It really was too warm for any of them, but it had been a long, hard day salvaging shipwreck scrap in the rocky reefs. A long, cold, hard day of work, with appendages needing to be free to grasp and pull, needing to be exposed to the cold, cold seawater and none of the sophants on the crew seemed quite ready to drop the ambient temperature.
There was a jolt as one of the overworked repulsors gave a complaint about the local gravity well and the rhythm of Human Friend Bobby Joe’s snores caught, and stopped. One massive shoulder, all Touchesinturn could see around the human couch, heaved up and then down. The distinctive smacking of dry human lips sounded, followed by a mildly distressed grunt. One long, jointed gripping appendage waved into sight lifting straight up towards the various tools swinging from the ceiling attachment points. Shatar Friend Second Sister Tilted her triangular head to watch with mild interest as the arm bent in that weird angular arrangement that spoke of internal rigidity at the central joint and the half extended fingers began to arc back into the rear compartment of the cabin. The arm began to twist however in a way that belied a single great bone and Touchesinturn felt his own appendages perk up in interest.
Human Friend Bobby Joe clearly wasn’t in any sort of pain. The sound of his breathing was too regular. The taste of his pheromones was too even. Most of all the work roughened stripes of his hands and arms glowed with health. However there was no way a single great internal support was allowing the muscles and veins visible under his external membranes to twist like that. Touchesinturn was reasonably sure that humans had one solid bone in each half of their arms and legs. At least, that is what he vaugely recalled from the emergency health and safety portion of their training back on the orbital station. However the training had been rushed as they were all reasonably experienced scrapers and there was a lot of time sensitive salvage to be doing.
As he watched the hand roaming and grasping with mild interest Shatar Friend Second Sister flicked an antenna to get his attention. He signaled her that she had it and she pointed the antenna at the water cylinder beside his transport sack. Touchesinturn suddenly understood. Human Friend Bobby Joe was looking for his drink. Instead of simply shifting his center of mass the few inches it would take to twist around and bring his eyes onto the rear compartment he was trying to use his spatial memory and tactile sense to find the item. Touichesinturn felt a wave of amused fondness and reached out to nudge the drink container closer to the arc of space Human Friend Bobby Joe’s hand was exploring. On the next sweep the human’s fingers brushed the cylinder and his forearm gave a sudden and extreme twist that definitely defied the ‘one bone’ concept. There were clearly two bones, and they were at least somewhat twisty.
His hold secured on the cylinder Human Friend Bobby Joe began lifting it straight up rather than forward into the cab and began taking it in a long sweeping motion away from his own mass. This, Touchesinturn was sure, was one of the actual limitations of that internal skeleton. Suddenly, with a slight pop, the lid of the container popped off. Both Touchesinturn and Shatar Friend Second Sister watched in mild interest, ready to offer assistance. Touchesinturn was reasonably sure that Human Friend Bobby Joe would have to untwist his forearm to get the container to a position that he could pour it into his mouth, and that twisting motion would certainly cause the contents to spill.
Human Friend Bobby Joe gave a disgruntled , wordless noise but didn’t request assistance. Instead he began a slow, careful series of movements, testing the limits of his movement while not spilling the now open container. His movements kept hitting that limit enforced by his twisty bones. Finally the human set the container down in a crook of the drivers couch, untwisted his now free arm and hand, and reached down to pick up the container in triumph. Quickly followed by the sounds of a human gulping down liquid.
Touchesinturn leaned back against the window. However Shatar Friend Second Sister had angled her head as if to get the human’s attention.
“That was not the most efficient way to do that,” she pointed out.
“So?” Human Friend Bobby Joe replied. “We in some kind of hurry?”
Another repulsor gave the transport a little bump and the Shatar flicked her frill in a non-committal reply.
“How many bones do you have?” Touchesinturn asked in sound.
Apparently that question warranted moving his center of mass because Human Friend Bobby Joe heaved himself up and leaned around the couch to squint at Touchesinturn.
“How many what do I have?” the human demanded, his colors flushing with surprise, as if Touchesinturn had asked something strange.

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