Humans are Weird - Limitations
“A hunting we will go, a hunting we will go. Heigh ho, the dairy-o, a hunting we will go!” Grabsover flung the cheery human song against the walls of the swimming channel and reveled in the waves of music that washed back over him. He sacrificed a bit of swimming power and used a few appendages to resecure his hunting satchel that was slipping down his center of mass. The sound of the tools clinking inside filled him with delight.
He had packed the custom made mobilization cage they would need if their group managed to capture the iridescent broad-wing that had been sounded in the southern marshes. You needed three things to capture one of the beautiful insectiods; a chemical lure specific to the time of the year and the food sources present in the eco-system, a micro-tubal net specifically manufactured to precise tolerances to not damage their wings, and most difficult of all, a human who was large enough to have a limbspread greater that the iridescent broad-wing’s wingspan, while still being fast and dexterous enough to leap up and throw the net. On top of that you had to have a human who was willing to go out into the insectoid rich southern marshes in the blistering heat of the midday to capture an insectoid for fun.
“A hunting we will go!” Grabsover roared out as he burst up and out of the water-lock and into the common room of Human Friend Thibodeaux’s living structure.
Grabsover paused a moment to absorb the room and felt a ripple of disappointment when he noted that Human Friend Thibodeaux was not in the common area to appreciate his entrance. However Tugsquickly was nearby sorting the lure scents into travel containers and waved cheerfully at him with a few lagging appendages. Grabsover hustled over to Tugsquickly and opened his satchel, making sure to dump out any lingering water in the proper drainage channels. Tugsquickly then began passing him the finished lure containers to tuck into their slots. However he hadn’t even finished stowing the ones that were done before the unease in Tugsquickly’s gestured passed itself onto Grabsover.
“Is something wrong with Human Friend Thibodeaux?” Grabsover asked.
“I am afraid so,” Tugsquickly gestured with his lagging end. “His stripes were a very sickly color spread when he came into the common room though he said he was feeling fine..”
Grabsover slumped in frustration. He was concerned for his friend of course, but the expedition today would be all but pointless without him. They could at best take images of the iridescent broadwings, and they already had plenty of those.
“That is a human for you,” he said. “It is having a brain that does it. It takes unds for a signal to work its way from the point of injury to the rest of the body.”
“I don’t think it is an injury,” Tugsquickly said.
“An infection?” Grabsover asked, horror causing his lagging end to arch up.
“Not quite an infection either,” Tugsquickly said, switching to sound as he finished sorting the lures and began putting the larger containers away. “From what he said, I think it would be best to call it and invasion.”
Just then one of the big human doors swished open and a low, agonized groan drifted across the room. Both Undulates set their work down and scampered around the human couch to greet Human Friend Thibodeaux as the mammal staggered out of the waste disposal room. His colors were far worse than Grabsover had expected from Tugsquickly’s description. From the surprise and unease in the set of Tugsquickly’s appendages Human Friend Thibodeaux had gotten distinctly worse in the intervening time. The human’s colors were almost washed out.
“Where is you bile?” Grabsover demanded frantically.
Human Friend Thibodeaux raised his eyes just enough to look at him and his face contorted in confusion.
“In my gallbladder...I think?” Human Friend Thibodeaux said.
Even his voice seemed colorless and muted.
“I believe that my friend means your blood,” Tugsquickly interjected.
“Well that is still inside me, thank goodness,” Human Friend Thibodeaux said with a grimace, “Probably the only bodily fluid that still is at this point.”
“Your stripes are dim,” Tugsquickly explained. “That means your blood is no longer warming your outer membrane.”
“Ah,” Human Friend Thibodeaux replied with a nod. “I get ya’. Yeah, all my bloods gone deep in to warm up my guts and stuff. There a battle going down in the bayou, if you get my drift.”
“I do not,” Grabsover informed them.
Human Friend Thibodeaux gave a groan and staggered over to the couch.
“You know how human organs are mostly bags of one size or another,” Tugsquickly explained as they followed him.
“Vaguely,” Grabsover replied.
Human Friend Thibodeaux reached the couch and let his massive form flop backwards onto it. They scrambled up to have a brief fight over prime lap locations.
“Well the biggest bag is has essentially a whole marsh’s worth of biodiversity in bacteria, yeast, and other such creatures, is that correct Human Friend Thibodeaux?” Tugsquickly asked as he accepted the second best place.
“Sounds about right,” the human said.
He was now leaned back with his eyes closed.
“If the ecological balance of that ecosystem is disrupted humans can get various symptoms,” Tugsquickly paused and lifted his gripping end inquisitively at the human.
“I got the galloping runs if you must know,” the human said in those tired, colorless tones. “I can walk all right, but I don’t dare get too far from the bathroom.”
“He means that his internal digestive bags keep voiding themselves against his will,” Tugsquickly explained.
“So these things just...live...inside of you?” Grabsover asked, feeling somewhat morbid fascination.
“All the live long day,” Human Friend Thibodeaux confrimed.
His pale colors suddenly rippled and he surged up, displacing them both, before stumbling for the waste disposal room.
“Shall we go lure in the broadwing for observation or just stay here?” Tugsquickly asked as they rearranged themselves on the couch.
Grabsover tossed his satchel down and slumped into the couch.
“Let’s stay,” he said. “I’m sorry you wasted the lure mixes, but I have more images of the broadwings to process than I have time for already.”
“It is not problem,” Tugsquickly assured him.
They rested together in silence for a few moments.
“And he just has a whole marsh ecosystem living inside of him?” Grabsover asked.
Tugsquickly gave a rumble of amusement.
“With a recognizable genetic profile as unique as his own,” Tugsquickly assured him.
“And sometimes it just, go bad and decides to flee his body?” Grabsover asked.
“Well, he thinks it was an invading bacteria that his larger immune system is trying to purge,” Tugsquickly replied. “He suspects it has something to do with ‘taco night’.”
He had packed the custom made mobilization cage they would need if their group managed to capture the iridescent broad-wing that had been sounded in the southern marshes. You needed three things to capture one of the beautiful insectiods; a chemical lure specific to the time of the year and the food sources present in the eco-system, a micro-tubal net specifically manufactured to precise tolerances to not damage their wings, and most difficult of all, a human who was large enough to have a limbspread greater that the iridescent broad-wing’s wingspan, while still being fast and dexterous enough to leap up and throw the net. On top of that you had to have a human who was willing to go out into the insectoid rich southern marshes in the blistering heat of the midday to capture an insectoid for fun.
“A hunting we will go!” Grabsover roared out as he burst up and out of the water-lock and into the common room of Human Friend Thibodeaux’s living structure.
Grabsover paused a moment to absorb the room and felt a ripple of disappointment when he noted that Human Friend Thibodeaux was not in the common area to appreciate his entrance. However Tugsquickly was nearby sorting the lure scents into travel containers and waved cheerfully at him with a few lagging appendages. Grabsover hustled over to Tugsquickly and opened his satchel, making sure to dump out any lingering water in the proper drainage channels. Tugsquickly then began passing him the finished lure containers to tuck into their slots. However he hadn’t even finished stowing the ones that were done before the unease in Tugsquickly’s gestured passed itself onto Grabsover.
“Is something wrong with Human Friend Thibodeaux?” Grabsover asked.
“I am afraid so,” Tugsquickly gestured with his lagging end. “His stripes were a very sickly color spread when he came into the common room though he said he was feeling fine..”
Grabsover slumped in frustration. He was concerned for his friend of course, but the expedition today would be all but pointless without him. They could at best take images of the iridescent broadwings, and they already had plenty of those.
“That is a human for you,” he said. “It is having a brain that does it. It takes unds for a signal to work its way from the point of injury to the rest of the body.”
“I don’t think it is an injury,” Tugsquickly said.
“An infection?” Grabsover asked, horror causing his lagging end to arch up.
“Not quite an infection either,” Tugsquickly said, switching to sound as he finished sorting the lures and began putting the larger containers away. “From what he said, I think it would be best to call it and invasion.”
Just then one of the big human doors swished open and a low, agonized groan drifted across the room. Both Undulates set their work down and scampered around the human couch to greet Human Friend Thibodeaux as the mammal staggered out of the waste disposal room. His colors were far worse than Grabsover had expected from Tugsquickly’s description. From the surprise and unease in the set of Tugsquickly’s appendages Human Friend Thibodeaux had gotten distinctly worse in the intervening time. The human’s colors were almost washed out.
“Where is you bile?” Grabsover demanded frantically.
Human Friend Thibodeaux raised his eyes just enough to look at him and his face contorted in confusion.
“In my gallbladder...I think?” Human Friend Thibodeaux said.
Even his voice seemed colorless and muted.
“I believe that my friend means your blood,” Tugsquickly interjected.
“Well that is still inside me, thank goodness,” Human Friend Thibodeaux said with a grimace, “Probably the only bodily fluid that still is at this point.”
“Your stripes are dim,” Tugsquickly explained. “That means your blood is no longer warming your outer membrane.”
“Ah,” Human Friend Thibodeaux replied with a nod. “I get ya’. Yeah, all my bloods gone deep in to warm up my guts and stuff. There a battle going down in the bayou, if you get my drift.”
“I do not,” Grabsover informed them.
Human Friend Thibodeaux gave a groan and staggered over to the couch.
“You know how human organs are mostly bags of one size or another,” Tugsquickly explained as they followed him.
“Vaguely,” Grabsover replied.
Human Friend Thibodeaux reached the couch and let his massive form flop backwards onto it. They scrambled up to have a brief fight over prime lap locations.
“Well the biggest bag is has essentially a whole marsh’s worth of biodiversity in bacteria, yeast, and other such creatures, is that correct Human Friend Thibodeaux?” Tugsquickly asked as he accepted the second best place.
“Sounds about right,” the human said.
He was now leaned back with his eyes closed.
“If the ecological balance of that ecosystem is disrupted humans can get various symptoms,” Tugsquickly paused and lifted his gripping end inquisitively at the human.
“I got the galloping runs if you must know,” the human said in those tired, colorless tones. “I can walk all right, but I don’t dare get too far from the bathroom.”
“He means that his internal digestive bags keep voiding themselves against his will,” Tugsquickly explained.
“So these things just...live...inside of you?” Grabsover asked, feeling somewhat morbid fascination.
“All the live long day,” Human Friend Thibodeaux confrimed.
His pale colors suddenly rippled and he surged up, displacing them both, before stumbling for the waste disposal room.
“Shall we go lure in the broadwing for observation or just stay here?” Tugsquickly asked as they rearranged themselves on the couch.
Grabsover tossed his satchel down and slumped into the couch.
“Let’s stay,” he said. “I’m sorry you wasted the lure mixes, but I have more images of the broadwings to process than I have time for already.”
“It is not problem,” Tugsquickly assured him.
They rested together in silence for a few moments.
“And he just has a whole marsh ecosystem living inside of him?” Grabsover asked.
Tugsquickly gave a rumble of amusement.
“With a recognizable genetic profile as unique as his own,” Tugsquickly assured him.
“And sometimes it just, go bad and decides to flee his body?” Grabsover asked.
“Well, he thinks it was an invading bacteria that his larger immune system is trying to purge,” Tugsquickly replied. “He suspects it has something to do with ‘taco night’.”
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