Betty Adams Tall Tales
  • Home
    • Book 1 "Humans are Weird: I Have the Data"
    • Book 2 "Humans are Weird: We Took a Vote"
    • Book 3 "Humans are Weird: Let's Work It Out"
    • "Flying Sparks"
    • "Dying Embers"
    • "Hidden Fires"
    • Testimonials
  • The Aliens
    • Dying Embers
    • Humans Are Weird
    • Miscellaneous
    • Fan Art
  • Betty's Blog
    • Humans Are Weird
  • Store: Betty's Booty
  • About & Contact
    • Bibliography
    • Links

Humans are Weird - Why

6/24/2024

Comments

 
Picture

Humans are Weird - Why

 The wood smoke was curling up through the branches of the thin canopy over the river in a lazy and untamed fashion as First Sister carefully wove the smoke guide that would hopefully make their little gathering that much more comfortable. Human Second Father and Human Second mother didn’t seem to mind the smoke occasionally finding them as they lounged in their folding chairs but First Sister was enjoying the activity and it did seem to prevent Human Second Cousin Betty from attempting to lure her into the water again. Second Cousin was gently coaching Fifth Sister through arranging enough sticks and detritus to start another fire for practice and various thumps and cracks from the underbrush around them indicated where the various human Brothers had dispersed to ‘get more firewood’. Though their efficiency in that task indicated that they were exploring the riverbank more than not.
First Sister gave a satisfied click as she finished the last of the weave work and thrust it into the soft, silty soil of the riverbank beside the ring of stones that contained the fire. She stepped back and watched pleased as the rising air slowly heated the weave work, creating a contorted draft of air that lifted the smoke up, above the heads of even the towering Human Second Father.
“Look at that!” Human Second Father called out, his bifocal eyes rolling to follow the smoke.
“Thank you First Sister,” Human Second Mother said, reaching out her hand to gently pat First Sister between her antenna.
First Sister clicked with pleasure and turned her attention to admiring the newest tiny human that Human Second Mother held. One Fourth Cousin Baby. First Sister had heard other names used for the little one, but Baby was by far the most prominent. The undergrowth rustled and several Human Brothers burst forth and dropped loads of wood in various piles before descending on the snacks stored in a cold-box. First Sister subtly eased closer to Second Cousin and Fifth Sister and gestured reassuringly with her antenna, and they went back to attempting to start the practice fire despite the chaos that had descended on the little riverbank. One of the Human Brother’s hoisted Human Fifth Cousin Baby onto his shoulders and began a hopping dance and song that had Second Cousin chittering with amusement despite how close it took them both to the fire and the rest of the Brothers had produced hatchets and saws and, after being shooed away to safe distances, had set to work reducing the wood to fuel sized fragments.
“The water is wonderful and your First Father said it was safe,” Human Second Cousin Betty declared as she sloshed her way out of the water where she had apparently been collecting small crustaceans in a basket. One of the Human Brothers descended on the basket and snatched it with perfunctory thanks and Human Second Cousin Betty let it go without comment. Taking her long braid of hair and twisting the water out.
“Must you do that?” demanded Second Cousin, clamping her frill to her neck in horror.
The human grinned and nodded.
“Gotta get the extra water out,” she said. “What did you want all the snip-toes for?”
First Sister noted that Human Second Cousin Betty’s attention was fully diverted from her attempts to lure First Sister into the heat stealing, toe abrading river and she relaxed the conversation turned to some aquaponics project a few of the older brothers were maintaining. The conversation drifted to a stop and one of the brother’s commented on the mid-summer heat.
“You’re hot?” Human Second Cousin Betty demanded in surprise.
“You’re not?” the Brother replied, equally surprised.
“No!” Human Second Cousin Betty said as she took a bite of fire roasted meat. “I wonder why?”
First Sister angled her antenna meaningfully and gave an attention click.
“Could it have something to do with the hour you just spent in the water?” she asked indicating the river.
There was a general pause in the conversation around the fire and then the adult humans burst out laughing, followed by the juveniles.
“That would do it,” Human Second Cousin Betty admitted with a grin.
The conversation began climbing it’s natural course a spark indicated that Fifth Sister had successfully started the fire.
Her mentorship done Second Cousin crept closer to First Sister.
“Did she forget she was just in the river?” she asked in low tones.
“I think that humans just store their memory vines differently than we do,” First Sister observed.  
Author Betty Adams Books
Amazon! 
Barnes & Noble
Powell's Books
Google Play Books
Kobo By Rakuten
Youtube
BitChute
Odysee
Rumble
Veoh
Picture
Comments

Humans are Weird - Skritchie

6/18/2024

Comments

 
Picture

Humans are Weird - Skritchie

Doctor Seventh Chirp extended a winghook to turn the page in the book he was reading. It was a fascinating artifact; smelling of forests long dead and the museums that had housed and preserved their harvested bodies. Fragments of pages were missing. The material rustled soothingly as he laid one ancient page down over the other. Which was probably a good think he mused as he stared in slightly horrified fascination of the printed image capture of what happened when a rapidly spinning blade made contact with a human forelimb. He felt the urge for a juice nodule and carefully closed the book and slipped its protective cover over it, feeling the electro-magnetic field crackle into existence.
He hopped away from the reading station and the massive tome built for alien appendages and hesitated as twinges ran through his wings and his feet. He heaved a sigh and began rolling his wings to get the blood flowing again.
“Getting old and smooth is not a pleasant experience,” he muttered as he thrust one leg and then the other out, letting himself rock backwards with the motion until he found himself tucked into one of the wall alcoves.
The light from the setting sun outside was slanting through the atmosphere and filled the space with a soft golden light. Continuing to roll his wings Doctor Seventh Chirp made his way to the launching window and sniffed the warm air appreciatively. He was about to spread his wings for take off when a sudden movement below him caught his attention and his nose frills wrinkled in annoyance. He craned his head around to get a better look and felt a few vertebrae shift.
“And what are you hiding my massive mammalian friend?” he muttered.
Security officer Alexei Drover was moving carefully from one outbuilding to another in a path that could only be designed to shield her from view from the main enclosed quad where most of the campus’s population would be recreating at the this time of day. It would have no doubt been very effective if he hadn’t been lingering in the reading rooms at the back of the library. A set of rooms that most humans did not have a good mental map of as they couldn’t fit in them. The human reached a rear entrance to a room that held low-security medical supplies and waved her security fob at the smooth surface. As the door swung open she braced it and glanced around cautiously, remember to look up into small-Winged sized alcoves he noted with a grim smile. As she did this her hand holding the fob dropped as one massive leg folded up and she vigorously scratched at her shin, grimacing in both anger and pain before slipping into the storage room.
“I doubt she will be in there a short time,” Doctor Seventh Chirp muttered as he debated approaching the door from outside.
His fob did have the proper clearances but opening that door would instantly alert Drover to his presence and furthermore would not give her time to properly begin what she was doing. Instead he chose to hop leisurely along an inner path of the building until he found a much smaller door that led into the pathway that wound around the inner ceiling of the space. Drover had apparently gotten access to the large cold packs, one was laying across the bare skin of her right leg, the adhesive bandages, she was currently applying one to a snout sized lesion on her left leg, and a good sized tube of antibiotic cream. Doctor Seventh Chirp stared in perplexity at the wingspan of bandages she had already applied to that leg. Under the center of each was a rather disturbingly large lump. She finished applying the last bandage with a grunt and reached over to move the cold pack from her right leg to her left. She released a hiss and her face relaxed with relief and the cold mass covered the bandages.
Doctor Seventh Chirp examined the newly exposed chilled skin with growing irritation. A curved line of welts ran from Drover’s toes, up her pale skin in bright red dots, ending about halfway up her shins. The pattern would suggest some terrifying large creature had given her the most gentle of bites but the marks were clearly mammalian skin reaction to some insect bite. What made his nearly smooth head bristle in annoyance was the alternating raised blisters and, small open lesions centering linear abrasions that indicated that the human had been ‘scratching’. Clearly the human had yet to apply the self selected medications to the other side.
Doctor Seventh Chirp heaved an audible sigh and let himself tumble noisily into the air. Drover started, glance over at him and then twisted her face into a scowl. He landed on the cold surface of her toes and glared at the nearest dot, this one had not been abraded, nor had it produced that bubble of fluid, showing only the tiny puncture wound in the center of where the human’s immune system was overreacting.
“You going to snitch?” Drover demand in a voice that was deep, even for a human.
“That is hardly the main thermal of this flight,” Doctor Seventh Chirp replied, deliberately trying to drop his voice into a tone a human would hear as an irritated growl. “You were bitten by some insect with piercing mouth-parts.”
Drover rolled her eyes and muttered a mild profanity to the effect that his observation was obvious. Doctor Seventh Chirp moved to the next lump. The core of inflamed flesh was there but the center was a raised blister, thicker than the length of his winghook. He prodded at the firmer flesh around it and got a wince from his patient and then at the blister getting none.
“Filled with interstitial fluid,” he commented eyeing the pale amber color, “no infection. How did this happen?”
“My footwraps,” Drover growled, shifting the leg he was perched on, but not enough to dislodge him so he ignored the movement. He stared calmly into the wide, concentric circles of her eyes, letting the ‘back depths’ of his own convince her to keep talking. “The skin,” she went on with a frustrated wave of her hand, “it was quite inflamed already. Just the abrasion of the foot wraps, and they are good silk, was enough to cause,” she gestured at the amber blisters with annoyance in every joint, and her face contorted in that odd mix of pain and irritation.
Doctor Seventh Chirp moved on to the next bump and the open sore the diameter of his ear. This one had ruptured ever so slightly deeper than the thick layer of dermal cells and there was a crusted layer of capillary blood seeping slowly out. Doctor Seventh Chirp gave it an aggravated glare and then turned his eyes on the equally aggravated Drover.
“It itched!” she snapped,narrowing her eyelids at him in a glare. The seconds stretched on between them and she faltered first. “I scratched!” she declared, half resentfully, half defiantly. “Like the ancient American, Barbara Pritchie.”
Doctor Seventh Chirp snorted, and held out a wing for the tube of ointment.
“Frietchie,” he said as he examined the contents and grudgingly admitted to himself that Drover had, in fact chosen the correct treatment on her own. He squeeze the proper amount onto the lesion.
“What?” Drover asked, confusion masking the irritation on her face for a moment.
“This great saint of therapeutic scratching that you humans are so fond of quoting,” he explained. “Her defiant virtues were extolled in the poems of one Ogden Nash.” He glared up at the human. “There is no actual evidence that she scratched when itchy, and her name was Frietchie, with an f.” He deliberately forced the difficult sound, one had to tuck ones lips around the back of ones teeth.
Drover’s face wrinkled between amusement and disbelief for a moment before breaking into a wide grin and laughing.
“Adhesive bandage,” Doctor Seventh Chirp snapped but couldn’t quite keep the amusement out of his own voice. “As admirable as personal courage might be,” he went on, “it is still inadvisable to scrape off layers of skin at the behest of instinct.”
“Says you,” Drover commented, but she kept her hands a respectable distance from her abraded skin so Doctor Seventh Chirp decided to leave it at that.


Author Betty Adams Books
Amazon! 
Barnes & Noble
Powell's Books
Google Play Books
Kobo By Rakuten
Youtube
BitChute
Odysee
Rumble
Veoh
Picture
Comments

Humans are Weird - Chilly

6/10/2024

Comments

 
Picture

Humans are Weird - Chilly

 The summer air was pleasantly full of mammalian chemical trails that, if one followed any one of the with one’s attention, led to a working, or even more satisfactorily, recreating mammal. The humans with the gargantuan biomass left such clear traces of their presence that one could bask in their presence even after they left the immediate area. This was a thread that was almost like the Gathering themselves.
Notes the Passing Changes let awareness drift down the main path where the taste of Sandy’s lingering effort spoke of deliberate attempts to harden muscles. The long winter, the busy spring, and the distractions attendant on coming reproduction had reduced the human to a notably smaller percentage of previously acquired mass and Notes the Passing Changes empathized with the effort of regaining lost biomass when there was so much going on. It was not like a human could simply request that the other species donate stored rotting plant matter either.
The trail – unsurprisingly – led Notes the Passing Changes to the dwelling nook Sandy and Pat were preparing for the complete budding of the little human who was already changing both their profiles so distinctly. Notes the Passing Changes idly wondered why they had not made a formal announcement of the addition to the colony yet but had been observing humans for long enough to understand that asking about such things could be probing a strand into chemically unstable soil. Awareness came first to the roots deliberately grown into the walls of the dwelling which Notes the Passing Changes rattled loudly until both humans gave a shout of welcome, then awareness could politely infuse the leafy evergreen shrubs the humans kept in the communal areas for communication.
“And how are ye doing this fine day?” Sandy asked from the couch where he was letting his limbs sprawl out.
“Quite well,” Notes the Passing Changes replied, feeling the soundness of the tendrils in the communication plant, they might need replacing soon, there was a trace of reverberation in the voice that was not pleasant, “and you?”
“Fair to middlin’, fair to middlin’,” Sandy said in a confident tone, raising a glass of water in demonstration of something.
The humans had not activated the internal lights of the room, and were relying on the light from the windows. That was enough to make the mostly bare skin of the male human glow. The thin wrap of colored plant matter that the human wore belted around his waist had let the summer sunlight turn his skin pink, and if Notes the Passing Change was any judge Sandy had pushed the limits of his ultraviolet light tolerances in his effort to build muscle mass earlier.
“Any reason for dropping in Notes?” Pat asked without looking up from the document she was writing on the screen in front of her.
“Social interaction,” Notes the Passing Changes replied studying the other human with some confusion.
While Sandy’s every fiber indicated being in warmth that threatened to be almost too much for comfort, Pat was wrapped in multiple layers of insulating cloth. A leaf of particular reflectivity was that her outermost layer was a thick winter coat that Notes the Passing Changes knew she had put away in long storage several weeks ago. It still smelled of the anti-fungal spray she had applied in the expectation that the chemical would have many more months to degrade.
“Are you comfortable Pat?” Notes the Passing Changes asked, trying to put concern into the odd tones produced by the old tendrils.
She gave a grunt of mild surprise and glanced over at the communication plant.
“Aye,” she said, and then bent over her work again.
Notes the Passing Changes mulled over the situation for several long moments while Sandy made light conversation about the compaction of the running paths.
“Only it is somewhat odd,” Notes the Passing Changes observed, in a pause in Sandy’s speech.
“What’s odd?” Sandy asked.
“That Pat seems to need to conserve heat in this ambient temperature when her mass is so much greater than yours,” Notes the Passing Changes stated.
The sudden silence in the room was the first clue that a social norm had been transgressed. Sandy had suddenly pulled his limbs into a more rigidly aligned from, was making eye contact with a storage unit on the opposite side of the room from his mate, and after a moment seemed to be restraining laughter. Pat had stiffened, shot a look of emotion unknown to Notes the Passing Changes towards the communication plant, before slamming her writing screen down on the table surface and announcing.
“I’m getting some fresh air.”
“Did I offend?” Notes the Passing Changes asked when all that was left in the room was the taste of her.
Sandy gave up on his attempts to restrain his laughter and fell back into a more relaxed position.
“Pat’s got circulation issues,” Sandy explained, clearly avoiding the concept of offense, “even it if its right balmy out she needs to wrap up sometimes. She’s been needing to do it more often than usual though.” He took a sip of his drink and gave a thoughtful hum. “Pretty common too,” he observed, “the lassies do run a bit cooler than the lads on the usual.”
Notes the Passing Changes took a moment to compare that to memory strands from the spring when the humans’ thermo-envalopes were the most noticeable. A quick comparison did show that human males tended to express more thermal energy than the females did. Pat returned in a few moments, gave the communications plant a bright smile and a cheerful word that Notes the Passing Changes took to mean that there had been no offense, but that Pat would not welcome a reintroduction of the topic. The room fell into easy silence and Notes the Passing Changes felt thankful that these humans did not feel the need to fill the air with sound. The steady ticking of Pat’s fingers on the screen, the thrum of Sandy’s cooling metabolism, and the chemical chaos of the tiny new human made a pleasant enough social interaction as it was.  
Author Betty Adams Books
Amazon! 
Barnes & Noble
Powell's Books
Google Play Books
Kobo By Rakuten
Youtube
BitChute
Odysee
Rumble
Veoh
Picture
Comments

Humans are Weird - The Mountain

6/3/2024

Comments

 
Picture

Humans are Weird - The Mountain

 Fstk’tk pattered happily along the catwalk letting the ambient vibrations of the base pulse up through her paws while her gripping claws adjusted the basket she held in front of her. The air tasted every so faintly of the staining agent the wood-fiber class was using to apply patterns to their baskets (hers was one of their unfinished products) and the air was muzzy with the vapor and particles in the air of textile industry. Fstk’tk made a mental note to run a manual check of the atmospheric quality sensors as she reached Human Friend Charm’s living quarters. She chittered happily to herself as she tapped the door bell and felt the vibrations of the chimes that sounded in the dwelling place. This was followed by a roar of greeting from Human Friend Charm and Fstk’tk trotted through the door.
Human Friend Charm had a wonderful sense of taste in interior decoration, that was sometimes visible behind the shelves crammed with every conceivable implement for weaving fibers of every sort, balls, tubes, and tangles of fibers of every sort from brilliantly colored synthetic blends to more muted natural tones, half finished weaving projects, and books of every description. Fstk’tk mindful stepped on a tome that seemed to be about weaving seats for some precarious looking water craft because she couldn’t avoid it.
“You here for that quivit sock?” Human Friend Charm asked, rising with what would have been majestic slowness from her practical research over a natural fiber square.
“Yes!” Fstk’tk said, holding up the basket. “First Textile Engineer is going to be giving a speech on thermodynamics modification and domestic species and I want to have it as an example!”
Human Friend Charm was already, rudely, turning to survey the crowded room and Fstk’tk had to remind herself that humans did not adhere to the same rules of behavior as a Trisk.
“Laundry pile,” Human Friend Charm suddenly declared, and began lumbering towards what Fstk’tk had initially thought was a new piece of human sized furniture. However as she circled the spider-walk around the interior of the room she realized with some shock that what must be most of Human Friend Charm’s clothing supply was piled in one corner, off-gassing warm mammal scents mingled with bacterial stench. Human Friend Charm folded over the pile, doubling her long body up, and began snatching at the top layer, grabbing individual clothing items, any one of which would have made a serviceable field tent for a Trisk, and tossing them lightly behind her until she had shifted nearly half the mass of the pile.
“There!” Human Friend Charm declared, snatching a small patch of vibrant color that resolved into the hand-worked quivit sock that had been the talk of the college for weeks when Human Friend Charm had first produced the original pair. According to Human Friend Charm the left sock had long since slipped through the sub-space ether that ate such socks, but Fstk’tk was reasonably sure that was human hyperbole. “Not gonna be a problem that it’s dirty?” Human Friend Charm asked, making a one handed attempt to organize her long hairs ash she handed the item to Fstk’tk.
“No problem at all,” Fstk’tk assured her. “This will help to demonstrate use – but - ”
Fstk’tk hesitated and Human Friend Charm looked at her curiously.
“But what Fussy Lil’ Friend?” the human prompted.
“But why is it dirty,” Fstk’tk finally worked up the courage to ask. “Are the laundry facilities non-functional?”
Human Friend Charm’s face contorted first in anger, then in self-directed annoyance, then in exasperated effort as she clearly fought through instinctive defensive reactions.
“Because I’ll get to my laundry eventually,” Human Friend Charm finally said, turning abruptly back to her work.
Fstk’tk gave a click of understanding and turned to leave. Of course what the human had said made no sense, not even grammatically in response to Fstk’tk’s question. However Fstk’tk had long since learned that such a reply actually meant that the human was dealing with complex psychological motivations that even the affected human might not fully understand and did not want to speak of it. Still Fstk’tk stuck a mental thread to the pile of clothing on the floor for later tugging.
Why would a perfectly healthy adult let a chaotic mess accumulate in their living space when the option of removing it was so easily and readily available?  
Author Betty Adams Books
Amazon! 
Barnes & Noble
Powell's Books
Google Play Books
Kobo By Rakuten
Youtube
BitChute
Odysee
Rumble
Veoh
Picture
Comments

      Get Updates On Latest Projects and Stories! 

    Subscribe to Newsletter
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture
    Audible
    AMAZON
    BARNES & NOBLE
    Powell's Books
    GOOGLE BOOKS
    KOBO Books
    YouTube 
    BitChute 
    Odysee

    Rumble
    Veoh
    PictureTeespring Store Buy COOL Merch

    SubscribeSTAR

    Author

    Betty Adams is an up and coming author with a bent for science and Sci-fi.

    Archives

    January 2025
    December 2024
    November 2024
    October 2024
    September 2024
    August 2024
    July 2024
    June 2024
    May 2024
    April 2024
    March 2024
    February 2024
    January 2024
    December 2023
    November 2023
    October 2023
    September 2023
    August 2023
    July 2023
    June 2023
    May 2023
    April 2023
    March 2023
    February 2023
    January 2023
    December 2022
    November 2022
    October 2022
    September 2022
    August 2022
    July 2022
    June 2022
    May 2022
    April 2022
    March 2022
    February 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015
    February 2015
    January 2015
    December 2014
    November 2014
    October 2014

    RSS Feed

    blogrollcenter.com
    Picture
    Blog Directory & Business Pages - OnToplist.com
Copyright © 2015
  • Home
    • Book 1 "Humans are Weird: I Have the Data"
    • Book 2 "Humans are Weird: We Took a Vote"
    • Book 3 "Humans are Weird: Let's Work It Out"
    • "Flying Sparks"
    • "Dying Embers"
    • "Hidden Fires"
    • Testimonials
  • The Aliens
    • Dying Embers
    • Humans Are Weird
    • Miscellaneous
    • Fan Art
  • Betty's Blog
    • Humans Are Weird
  • Store: Betty's Booty
  • About & Contact
    • Bibliography
    • Links